Missing Out On Graduation : OFW Dad's Woe

Last Wednesday, my cute niece Jhamaica graduated from nursery school with second honors. We are so proud of our princess. Her mom, grandma and Ate Dai was there to celebrate the event. It was held at the provincial convention center with all the politicians doing their political show-your-face around before the coming elections. Their speeches lasted more than the actual graduation ceremonies.

While mom was there, and so was her grandma, it was a sad sorry miss for her dad, who must be so proud of his "unica-hija" princess, too. Bob is working as a chef in a luxury cruise ship based in Miami, Florida. They do the weekly Caribbean cruise. This, I could imagine, is a bit frustrating for Bob who I am sure would have gone home if it would have been okay or possible. He has to deal with the sorry miss as he has to make sure the future of his children will be secured. My sis Malynn fills in the gap for Bob - superwoman. She have been doing this for the past 8 years or so. This is the setback of being an overseas foreign worker (OFW). One misses out on special events like this. Yes we have digicams, video cams, YM, skype to get to each other no matter where we are but nothing feels like being there - feeling the moment of triumph.

Several years ago, I got a contract to work in Canada for two years. It was nearly just a formality to get the temporary working visa but at that time my daughter Dai was due to graduate in less than two years. I will surely miss that out too. I will not be able to go home for the next two years once I sign the contract, or it will be very expensive. That I could not take. Being separated - it would really be a sad, sorry miss. Bottom line, I did not sign the contract - I have no regrets. Nothing beats the feeling of telling your child how proud you are for her and thanking her for bearing with you.

Involving Your Children In Your Business

A year ago my cousin and I started a restobar business. In the early stages things were OK except I am losing time for my children. The work starts at 5:00pm and will last till about 2:00am the next day, sometimes even more. I do not even have the chance to see my children except when I report for work late. I would have to wait until both were back from school.

This is when I decided to take them to the business every weekend. My daughter works as cashier and finance officer handling the weekly payroll, while my son will handle the bar and food dispatch and inventory. Both of them will even wait at tables if we have plenty of guests or during special occasions and catering.

This opportunity gave us more topics to discuss on the way to and from the business to our house. I would share with them insights on the business and they would share their thoughts and ideas too. This was particularly true when the effects of the recession became evident in our daily sales. Each would have his or her own idea on how to pep up our sales. This gave them more sense of responsibility and ownership of the business.

Involving your children in your business is a way to test their knowledge, values, strengths and weaknesses. It gives them more confidence to handle various situations in life when prompted to make decisions. I have delegated to them tasks and decision making which I would normally be doing - alone. For me, this is my way to test and affirm how effective I am as a parent, coach, associate, business partner and manager. This is a way to make sure that whatever I do, they will always be with me and I shall always be there for them... it will not be forever but I will be more confident they will be ready for life ahead. Education, after all, does not equate to schools only.

Bringing My Kid To School

This morning, my son's first class is at 8:00am. He studies at the nearby National Science High School. He is in second year. So we took off at 7:45am as the school is just a 5-minute drive using the motorbike. I use the bike more often now as gas prices are still considerably high even as crude prices in the world market have gone down over the last few months.

I noticed that that the motorbike sways a bit and tries to follow crevices in the road uncontrollably. So we pulled over and found out we got ourselves a flat tire. Off he went and just took the public transportation jeep, we were barely a little over a kilometer away from his school.

JM will normally take the jeepney ride to school but when my schedule permits, I enjoy the ride when I take him to school. Sooner or later, he would no longer appreciate these simple little things as he would have a "world of his own". For now, I shall enjoy this.

How Time Flies

It has been ten years now since my wife and I separated. Our children stay with me in my house and my ex-wife lives nearby. Our daughter is now 22 years and is graduating from a degree in psychology. My son is in science high school and is likewise doing well.

Yesterday, I passed by our old house and noticed that the six foot palm trees I planted just before we separated have grown to less than twenty feet. Funny how time flies...

This is just like our children, they have grown so fast and so well. Soon I shall be alone again as they have their own families and just like us, the circle of life will go on...